What is your definition of true beauty? Is it a drop-dead bombshell with stunning hair, perfect bone structure and eye lashes that reach the sky? By the massive amount of YouTube videos focusing on how to enhance the way we look with all sorts of beauty products and tricks, it should come to no surprise that our culture may be a bit confused about the true meaning of beauty. What is true beauty? Read on and find out the 15 differences between beautiful people as the YouTube world and media see it and truly beautiful people.
1. Beautiful people are easily overlooked, while truly beautiful people have an everlasting effect.
Charm can be deceiving and beauty fades away, but true beauty never does! While beautiful people are more focused on the passing beauty and fading good looks, truly beautiful people understand that true beauty comes from within; it is the source of kindness and love you display towards everyone around you. Kindness is what makes true beauty come to life and no one can ever take it away from you. It can last forever.
2. Beautiful people fit in, while truly beautiful people do not conform.
While beautiful people strive to look like the model on the magazine, truly beautiful people strive for individuality. What makes you truly beautiful is not how you conform to the ideas of the world, but how you make the world conform to your ideas and your beautiful mind.
3. Beautiful people are generic, while truly beautiful people are like a masterpiece.
Mozart began writing music at age 6. Three centuries later, his music is still admired and inspires millions around the world. Truly beautiful people are very much like Mozart’s compositions; they have the power to impact lives and inspire the world even after hundreds of years have passed.
4. Beautiful people are selfish, while truly beautiful people focus on giving.
Unlike superficial beauty which is mostly focused on fulfilling selfish desires, true beauty comes from what the heart gives. The selfless smile you give away, the hug you share with a friend in tears, and the food you make to share with those in need—that’s what makes you truly beautiful!
5. Beautiful people seek perfection, while truly beautiful people embrace imperfection.
There is something beautiful about imperfections: it features your incomparable qualities; it makes you human. While beautiful people may think beauty is found in the flawless skin, size 2, stunning tan and long flowing hair; truly beautiful people understand beauty is instead found in the birthmarks, the extra little fat around the waist, the messy hair when you first wake up and the real you without make up. True beauty is found in how imperfect you are and how real you dare to be.
6. Beautiful people get confidence from looks, while truly beautiful people get confidence from within.
While beautiful people are all about how they look and how the world perceives them physically, truly beautiful people understand there is something absolutely stunning and fascinating about confidence that is founded in courage, experience and wisdom. That same confidence reminds you that although you may not fit in or look the part, your beauty is unparalleled because of your knowledge and your ability to see your worth even when the rest of the world fails to see it.
7. Beautiful people lose beauty, while truly beautiful people’s beauty is timeless.
When I was a little girl, I couldn’t wait to be a teenager. When I was a teenager, I couldn’t wait to be an adult. Now that I am an adult, I am looking forward to my later years in life. Perhaps that desire comes from seeing how timeless true beauty is and how it is inevitably found in every stage of life. The trick is to enjoy each moment and understand there is a time and a season for everything. While beautiful people believe beauty is only found in the younger years, truly beautiful people understand that true beauty is timeless only when you have the courage to embrace everyday, every new journey, every new blessing in disguise and when you refuse to believe the lie the world tells of beauty dissipating in your old age.
8. Beautiful people are born, while truly beautiful people are made.
Unlike the ridiculous characteristic of superficial beauty where everyone is expected to look the same with minor variations, true beauty does not discriminate. Truly beautiful people understand that true beauty is attainable the moment you choose to embrace it. The moment you choose to embrace everything that is selfless, kind, courageous and loving about you, true beauty surfaces transforming you from the inside out, molding you into a timeless masterpiece, a true work of art.
9. Beautiful people lack drive, while truly beautiful people are passionate.
While beautiful people may be so focused on their looks they miss fully experiencing life, truly beautiful people know you can’t have true beauty without passion. Passion is that desire for living and enjoying everything that makes you human, everything that makes you feel alive. There is nothing quite as irresistible as living in the moment, fully willing to experience each second and savor each opportunity of laughter and love life offers. True beauty is found in the passion you bring into your work and relationships. Passion fuels true beauty like no other thing can.
10. Beautiful people live in fear, while truly beautiful people live daringly.
While beautiful people are completely afraid to rock the boat and step out of their comfort zone, truly beautiful people are daring. The courage found in trying something new, in feeling vulnerable and exposed is what true beauty is all about. The possibility of failing and the courage to dare anyway is at the heart of those who are truly beautiful.
11. Beautiful people love conditionally, while truly beautiful people love without reserve.
Beautiful people are concerned with getting their feelings hurt and put up walls to ensure that never happens. Truly beautiful people understand that in love, just like in life, what you give is what you get. Truly beautiful people are focused on loving fully and thoroughly despite the cost.
12. Beautiful people give up easily, while truly beautiful people embrace perseverance.
Beautiful people are so focused on instant gratification they easily give up on what they pursue. Truly beautiful people understand good things take time and therefore, they are willing to persevere at all cost to reach the desired end.
13. Beautiful people lack perspective, while truly beautiful people understand the things that matter.
While beautiful people are focused on the new fashions and latest Kim Kardashian gossip, truly beautiful people know there are more important things in life. Truly beautiful people focus on what is going on around them and how it affects those they love. They strive to serve and live lives that are worthy of praise.
14. Beautiful people are reckless, while truly beautiful people embrace patience.
While beautiful people are used to getting their way in every possible way due to their physical attributes, truly beautiful people know that “good things come to those who wait.” Truly beautiful people embrace the moment when patience must be exercised and time measured not by how quickly it passes by but by how much living is taking place in the passing time.
15. Beautiful people are proud, while truly beautiful people embrace humility.
Beautiful people are so proud of what they look like that they fail to embrace and get in touch with their humble spirit. Truly beautiful people understand that “pride comes before destruction and an arrogant spirit before the fall.” Therefore, truly beautiful people embrace humility and strive to serve instead of being served.
Ageing is something that is often only talked about in hushed voices with a carefully chosen group of friends. People fear old age, and that’s completely normal, but counting 40 as old age is a really silly thing to do. I guess we can just blame Hollywood or fashion magazines for the unrealistic expectations we have when it comes to beauty and ageing, particularly for women, but they are not the only ones that demonize mature women. The media went crazy with the recent Caitlyn Jenner story, and some of the remarks related to age were just appalling.
Well, you know what, I’ve learned a lot from the older women in my life, and I hope I’ll be able to share some of the great advice and life lessons with the younger generations one day. Turning forty is nothing to fear. In fact, it has its own set of unique perks, and there are lots of important things a woman learns by the time she turns forty.
1. We have to learn to let people down gently
While it may be much less time consuming and irritating to just turn someone down with a few simple words and a cold stare, it’s usually not the best way to go about things. Whether it’s a guy at the club asking for your number, or a friend looking for a favour, you need to gracefully declinepeople in order to avoid conflict or feeling bad afterwards.
2. We know no one else can tell you how to live your life
Your parents, as well as every grandmother, aunt, cousin, sister, brother, friend, boyfriend or girlfriend, and colleague will have something to say about how you should live your life. You can’t please everyone, so don’t try to please anyone and just do the things that make you happy. It’s good to ask for some feedback, but it is ultimately your life and your opinion is the one that counts.
3. We will earn lots of respect and trust through the art of active listening
It can be difficult for people to keep quiet and let another person speak for a while, and even then a lot of us are just thinking about what we are going to say next instead of absorbing what the other person is trying to tell us.Active listening is a skill, and as a woman matures, she learns just how powerful of a tool, or even a weapon, it can be.
4. We do whatever it takes to feel sexy and confident
You may feel like the person you are is dictated by the way you look, and you may feel like you can’t change the cards that you have been dealt. However, it’s all about how you feel on the inside and your actions that can be used to define you, and you have the right to feel good in your own body.
There’s a lot you can do about aesthetic issues like having bags under your eyes, wrinkles or any other features that you don’t find too appealing. Exercise, aesthetic surgery and good cosmetics can make you feel sexy and confident, and it is incredibly important that you feel this way on a daily basis. But remember that you don’t need to change a thing about yourself, because you’re already beautiful.
5. We know that when we want something done right, we have to do it ourselves
Delegating your work is sometimes necessary, but it’s a bad idea to get used to relying on others for help. Not only are a lot of people a bit irresponsible, but you also get things done a lot quicker when you do them yourself without waiting on others and getting stressed about the whole situation.
6. We need only a couple of good girlfriends and a bottle of wine to get through tough times
Never keep things bottled up inside for too long – calling up a couple of friends, opening a bottle of wine and having a good long talk is one of the best ways to let go of frustrations and grudges. It is a form of mental cleansing that every woman should do at least once a week.
7. We have to calm ourselves down first, before trying to calm others down
You may think that you are being the rational and collected one who is waving a white flag and offering peace, but nine times out ten both parties in an argument are acting out without even noticing it. There always needs to be one side that is somewhat calm if you don’t want things to get out of hand, so it’s very important to take a few deep breaths and calm yourself down, before trying to talk another person down.
8. We find quality sleep to be the elixir of youth
Some say it’s the food we eat, others stress the benefits of exercise, and romantics point to love, but, while all these things are good for your physical and mental well-being, a full 8-9 hours of quality sleep every night will really do wonders for you. Sure, sometimes we need to sacrifice a bit of sleep for an evening of good sex, but we should strive to get as much rest as we can during the week.
9. We understand that there’s a difference between having fun and wasting money
When you’re younger you simply throw money away in the name of fun and relaxation, not really caring about saving up. However, as any responsible mature woman who has dabbled in couponing will tell you, there is a way to spend less without sacrificing much in the way of comfort. Spending a Friday night at home and cooking your own dinner is perfectly fine, as a few quiet nights will allow you to save enough money to go on a vacation in a few months.
10. We know jealousy, envy and anger just drain our energy and ruin relationships
People can be quite bad at times, and it is good to keep your guard up or even get emotional every now and then. However, strong emotions can hijack your life and ruin relationships if you let them. Sure, we will all become jealous or angry at some point, but you need to be confident enough to keep your feelings under control. Having something lingering in the back of your mind doesn’t do you any good. You can get addicted to feeling sad or angry, but letting go is the best option.
11. We’ll drop a topic if someone isn’t nearly as enthusiastic about it as we are
Did you ever get the feeling that people weren’t that into a topic you were passionately raving on about for 30 minutes? Let’s be honest, I’ve been guilty of this many times myself, and a lot of people will let you ramble on for fear of offending you. The simple solution is to drop the conversation when you sense indifference, but this requires some of that active listening we mentioned before, i.e. allowing other people to chime in with their opinion. You’ll also have to pick up on the subtle, and not so subtle body language cues that are a clear indication that your friend is disinterested and bored.
12. We have life experience that trumps book smarts and theoretical skill
You’ll meet tons of vibrant young people who talk about life, love, philosophy and politics, but it’s easy to see that they parrot a few articles and the 2-3 books that they’ve read. And that’s if they care enough to do some research. You, on the other hand, have 20 or more years of firsthand experience with all manner of people and situations, which means that your opinions will have more weight, and that you can outperform ambitious, but inexperienced youngsters.
13. We get to have plenty of great sex
With all that life experience, financial freedom, confidence and sexiness, expect to have some great sex. While the old belief that women reach their sexual peak later in life has been challenged by recent studies, you can’t argue with the fact that at this point you are more in-tune with your body and a whole lot more experienced with romance. We know how to pick out the good ones when choosing a partner, and we know full-well how to make him or her happy.
14. We have learnt to get along with the people we work with
Every woman has her share of workplace stress, and a few stories about difficult co-workers that she likes to tell in order to vent a bit, but in the long run it’s best to develop a positive relationship with the people at work. Many business professionals have stressed the importance of team building activities, and even something as simple as a night at the bar with some of your colleagues can really help ease tension at work by building trust and empathy between you.
15. We hold ourselves accountable, which makes solving problems much easier
The moment you start acknowledging the fact that you are responsible for your own life choices, and that there isn’t always someone to blame for your misfortune, is the moment you begin to work harder on solving the problems that keep pulling you back. Giving up the notion that you are somehow owed something by those around you or society in general is the most liberating experience.
16. We have overcome adversity, and we know what we are truly capable off
We all think we’d do well in certain situations and fail miserably at others, but when faced with these situations a lot of people find that the opposite is truth – you might choke up while giving a speech that you have practiced for hours and hours, and on the other hand you might pull someone out of a car wreck and safe his or her life while others stand by paralyzed with shock.
You need a bit of adversity to help strengthen your character and let you find out things about yourself you didn’t know before. At forty, you’ve got plenty of adversity behind you, and you know yourself much better. To paraphrase an ancient general and master strategist: if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
17. We know our limits, and that actually makes us stronger
The feeling of invincibility you have as a teenager and young adult slowly goes away as you come face to face with some of the harsh realities of the world, but knowing exactly where your limits lie doesn’t clip your wings and make you abandon your dreams. In fact, this knowledge only helps you adapt and choose the best strategy when faced with a challenge.
18. We allow other people to have different opinions
Immature people tend to be very arrogant and think that their opinion is all that matters. Even in terms of fashion sense or taste in music, which are incredibly subjective, some people think that what they like is “the right way”, and will put everyone else down. Over the years, you learn to live and let live – cohabiting, going out and having fun with people with views and sensibilities fairly different from your own.
19. We know love can grow, blossom, and wither away, but you will find it again
When you’re younger love is this huge thing that makes you feel like no one’s ever felt before. However, all relationships go through several phases. The truth is that you can fall deeply in love with someone over several months, feel that your heart is so full that it could just burst, get so attached to them in the next couple of years that you can’t imagine life without them, and then just have that feeling slip away quietly, leaving you indifferent and lonely.
People can also turn out to be jerks, and outside factors may pull people apart. The good news is that we can find this feeling over and over with the right people, and it may even last a lifetime if you find someone who’ll work as hard on the relationship as you will.
20. We are able to provide for ourselves and those we love, and it gives us tons of confidence
One of the biggest problems with self-esteem in young people stems from the fact that they are overly-dependent on others. Their parents have a big say in how and what they do, their peers affect the way they dress and behave, and they are limited by a lack of funds and skills. A woman turning 40 is able to provide for herself and the people she loves, and this gives her the confidence to be herself, stand up for her beliefs, and challenge others when they step over the line. There is no feeling like having enough financial independence to call your own shots.
When all is said and done, life beyond forty presents an exciting new chapter in every woman’s life. Reaching a mature age is not viewed as something negative – at forty we still have plenty of time to enjoy ourselves, only now you know better and can make smarter decisions.
If only there was a machine that could measure the level of happiness and distinguish what affects it… Oh wait, there isn’t. And yet, in most cases, we can tell a happy person from an unhappy one. Why is that so? We’ll look at some of the happy people and explore their routines. As these are different people, their habits may seem to contradict each other, but that’s just a surface of things. Needless to say, these habits won’t necessarily make you happy; still, they may be a great source of inspiration for another joyful day. What do happy people do?
1. They value family and company
Indonesians are a well-known proof of a popular axiom ‘wealth is not everything’. Living in slums, not having enough fresh water, facing tsunamis and the discomforts of overpopulation, they rejoice in their families and friends. In the country where different ethnicities and religions coexist, there is a special sense of tolerance. The national survey reports that it’s family matters that make Indonesians so happy.
2. They try to fulfill their basic needs
In many respects, especially those connected with climate, we can’t change our comfort zone, but this is not the reason to deprive yourself of those basic needs that can be fulfilled. What about the joys of sleep? Richard Shane, a scientist who once suffered through insomnia, has dedicated an entire series of articles to sleeping well. They feature the matters that are not covered in the literature of this kind too often, for example, about relaxing your tongue. The scientist says that sleep deprivation can really make you unhappy, and on the contrary, healthy sleep has enormous positive impact.
3. They help other people
This works simply and surely: when you help others, you are not alone in this world, and happiness of others makes you happy, too.
Mahatma Gandhi was reported to say, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
Working with pets often helps overcome depression.
4. They can stand up and say no
There is a chance you can be lost in volunteering and helping others – in a bad sense. As every worker, volunteers may get a burnout, which has already become a popular research subject.
Sonya Derian says, “If you say yes to everything, never discerning the right yes for you, what difference does it make what you’re saying yes to? Your yes loses its authority”.
5. They stop living for the future
Alan Watts, a philosopher and writer who used to popularize Eastern philosophy in Britain, particularly in his book ‘The Wisdom of Insecurity: A Message for an Age of Anxiety’, argues that we live in the future too much. Craving to live better, people hurry, work too hard, and struggle emotionally for the sake of abstract future. But it is possible to live happily in the present without the assurance that the future will also be good.
6. They have a dream
Another Eastern concept of happiest people gaining popularity in the West is ikigai, “the reason you wake up in the morning”, and some happy people definitely have one. The legend has it that one woman was returned to life after a lethal disease when to the ancestors’ question ‘Who are you?’ she answered: “I am the one who wakes up each day to care for my family, and nurture the young minds of the children at my school”. A dream is something about the future, and yet it can shape your happy present.
7. They make things happen
They don’t cry for the moon and don’t complain. Despite of his ASL, Stephen Hawking has made prominent scientific discoveries. What is more, he found vivid words to tell the world about his findings.
8. They can wait
Sophie Fontanel is a writer who spent many years in deliberate celibacy. Not that she didn’t want sex at all and not that she was against it. She only insisted that people can wait. They don’t need to force themselves info relationships just for the reason that everyone does it. This waiting is not at all like waiting for a prince.
“I think it’s a mistake to think that women are always expecting love. We are expecting to be in good hands, even if these good hands are just for two nights or one week”.
This doesn’t mean that you have to live in celibacy but it means that sometimes you have to wait for what you desire. Happy people can be passionate about other cravings just like this.